Self Esteem! I’m Not Good Enough…

2001 brought about Channel 4’s Big Brother reality show, initially designed as a social experiment to observe how people interacted in a confined space with nothing but each other to focus on. Cameras in the made-up home were everywhere! Whilst we watched eagerly the producers behind the scenes were busy editing and controlling what they felt was good viewing with the sole purpose to up the ratings to gain a successful series at whatever cost (the participants and their families)The programme invited us the general public into a world of voyeurism like nothing we had experienced on television. The birth of reality shows was upon us, bringing Joe public into our homes each night for X number of weeks, therefore, encouraging us all to put our private lives on show. Big Brothers watching… WOW… how entertaining for us and the prospect of the shock factor! Each series brought along more hype and more and more ‘OMG’ moments!

Social Media is now a very similar. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram etc… All a huge part of life and for some a platform to display how well life is treating them, whilst others feel left out or left behind, triggering inferiority “ I’m not feeling good enough” that troublesome internal negative voice deep within.

We’re constantly bombarded by people updating their status to see how whose achieving what, what’s cool, what’s NOT cool, the best government – even our MPS are expected to appear as celebrities on our television screens and the media insisting that a public debate takes place in order to tear shreds out of each other!
What is that doing to their inner being? Who would want to withstand that public ridicule? Sadly, a constant reminder of “YOUR’E NOT GOOD ENOUGH” is drip fed to each of us on a daily basis.
So, what can you to do to protect yourself against feeling not as good as the next person?
How can you relieve the rising pressure building up inside?
How can you reduce the rising levels of stress and anxiety, that low mood or even depression?

Note to self ‘NOBODY’ from whatever walk of life can maintain the Perfect Life, Perfect Job, or Perfect Family with Perfect Children!!! Appearances can be very deceptive, especially on social media where you can control what parts you choose to show. It’s often an illusion and if were not feeling very self-assured or life happens to be throwing us a difficult time (which happens to every person at some point in life), we can easily fall under the spell of feeling disillusioned, and not actually seeing the actual reality, only seeing what we believe “WE DO NOT HAVE “or feeling unable to keep up with the competition. It’s a pressure!

My message for you is this, (which I share with my clients).
We are not infallible human beings, were just visiting this planet for a very short space of time. So, embrace your uniqueness and accept yourself for who you are. Love YOU, you’re important.

Here’s my top 10 tips to ensure you take on some good self-care.
1) Stop competing, be kind to yourself by doing positive things (you like).
2) Set yourself a challenge and stick to it (keep it simple if need be).
3) Be in the moment… the here and now… observe what you’re doing.
4) Focus on the positive aspects of your life.
5) Change that negative self-talk into a positive self-talk.
6) Respect and listen to how you talk to yourself and others.
7) Have fun, bring the WOW factor into your days, and add some colour.
8) Get some support. Learn how to break the cycle.
9) Get with nature – look at what’s around you
10) Enjoy the seasons and embrace your day


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